Saturday, July 26, 2014
Learning how to pause and to not negatively react to someone when you're provoked - this is one of life's most important lessons. The more you learn to pause in your daily life, the happier and more emotionally balanced you will be! Try deep breaths, chanting an internal mantra, or just focusing your eyes on something to distract you if someone is pushing Every.Last.One.Of.Your.Buttons. Some of these techniques can mean the difference between a good or very, very bad day. Can I get an amen?
Tuesday, July 8, 2014
Sunday, July 6, 2014
I love Melissa McCarthy as a comic. Having seen her interviewed, she also strikes me as an incredibly smart and likable woman. (To this point, I recently sent a tweet: "Is Melissa McCarthy perhaps the most likable woman on the planet?"). Well, that was pre-"Tammy." It's for these reasons that I found the new film so dreadful.
Aside from the fact that "Tammy" was pretty darn boring, it's also off-putting and simply not very smart. McCarthy joking to a male suitor that he smells "like a cookie," plus shot after shot of McCarthy doing physical comedy that accentuates her obesity, probably sum up the reasons why I saw several moviegoers in my audience get up and walk out.
With many of McCarthy's television and film choices, I see what I imagine is part of her agenda: to show female characters who can be both overweight and sexual (something we rarely, if ever saw before), as well as characters who are outspoken and unafraid. But with "Tammy" - which McCarthy cowrote! - we see so many pathetic stereotypes regurgitated again and again.
Melissa, you truly are a comedic gem. Next time, more cleverness please in place of the fat-people, potty humor that defines this last film!
Friday, July 4, 2014
Thursday, July 3, 2014
Believe it or not, some adults are stuck in childhood to the degree that they occasionally have what I call an adult temper tantrum. People typically say an adult with this problem has a "bad temper" but the truth is that they have temper tantrums just like little kids do. In society, it seems to be more prevalent and accepted that men have bad tempers. Ever wonder what all the women do when society says it's not okay for them to turn over a table or scream all over the house? In a nutshell, women are more likely to internalize their feelings.
Recently a client of mine told me about what happens in her house when her husband loses his temper. In short, everyone gets scared and walks around on eggshells until her husband gets his mood under control. My client loves her husband but is afraid this trait will never change. I explain consistently with my clients that people can't necessarily change their personality, but they can certainly change their behaviors.
Let me be clear when I say this: If someone in your house is guilty of adult temper tantrums, you must say "No more." You must create a No Tantrum policy to protect the peace of your house and environment. Everyone must learn how to manage their feelings, and there are countless outlets that are good for frustration when someone feels overwhelmed.
The most important thing to do if someone in your life has tantrums that affect you is to sit the person down and seriously describe how the tantrums affect you. Explain that you are willing to work together with that person to help him or her find better ways to cope when he or she feels overwhelmed. Do not forget that adult tantrums must be unacceptable and understand that you must take a proactive approach to this problem if you ever want things to truly change.